BÖHÖ ESPORTS   id:  13234993
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo. We all know Gru is the godly height of 14.5 feet tall and can move at a speed of 200 Meters per second. Based on average dick size, Gru’s penis is around 14 inches long. Also, Gru’s dick would weigh around 2 pounds considering the average weight of a dick is .77 lbs. If he swung his dick in a circular manner, it would have the centripetal acceleration of 72.57 meters per second. This means that gru can dickslap with the immense energy of 11,421 pounds per sq inch at a tip speed greater than 584415.58336974 MPH. In conclusion, Gru’s dickslap has enough energy to smash through 6” reinforced concrete and will cause a thunderclap as his dick breaks the sound barrier. I rest my case. I further my case by pointing out The avg speed of ejaculation is 28 mph. This means that gru can ejaculate at a speed of roughly 70 MPH when standing still. If he decides to fling his ejaculate by swinging his dick in a circular fashion, it will travel at 584415.5*70= 40,909,085 mph. This means Gru’s ejaculate travels at a speed greater than 24 thousand times the speed of a bullet. Considering the average mass of ejaculate, 3.5 g, gru’s semen will impact the target with the energy of 1.715e9 Jouls, or roughly the amount of energy released in 667 pounds of TNT. In conclusion, if gru decided to weaponize his penis, he could easily conquer the world. Now I rest my case